https://www.numbersdontdefineus.com/posts daily 0.75 2020-07-15 https://www.numbersdontdefineus.com/posts/2020/7/15/journaling-in-recovery monthly 0.5 2020-07-15 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1594844603843-8JBP5Y5JKCFMR525DQHO/88C0F70A-783C-4B4D-9618-CF67F2BCA3D1+4.JPG Posts - Journaling in Recovery https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1594844014310-J6FYTVGWKKJQVTAXAA1V/Reasons+to+Recover Posts - Journaling in Recovery https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1594844628930-METJVK7Q4NBO22JFOQ8Y/B5366874-F41F-43CA-887E-6BFB94472ED8+4.JPG Posts - Journaling in Recovery https://www.numbersdontdefineus.com/posts/2020/4/3/eating-disorder-recovery-during-covid-19 monthly 0.5 2020-04-04 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1585959191233-0WFH15W1F5OCVHO74FEV/coronavirus.jpg Posts - Eating Disorder Recovery During COVID-19 https://www.numbersdontdefineus.com/posts/2020/1/6/a-decade-for-living monthly 0.5 2020-01-06 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1578345544063-56PBNNSM0NQRJ1AGK6WS/CD355107-B044-40DF-811A-CEE7274BF4AB.jpg Posts - 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Nineteen https://www.numbersdontdefineus.com/posts/2019/3/28/leaving-loneliness-behind monthly 0.5 2019-03-28 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1553798875511-LVXHZ4ABUO78T2E1T9MX/Facetune_28-03-2019-14-43-29.JPG Posts - Leaving Loneliness Behind https://www.numbersdontdefineus.com/posts/2019/3/15/what-recovery-really-means monthly 0.5 2019-03-15 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1552672177664-22KQWW4VM13ON287TYMX/IMG_1562.JPG Posts - What Recovery Really Means https://www.numbersdontdefineus.com/posts/2019/3/1/come-as-you-are monthly 0.5 2019-03-02 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1551493090368-HH6I5TG9SQEVL57G23VI/1D021FB3-FC93-406E-A5D4-D95A8364079F.JPEG Posts - Come As You Are https://www.numbersdontdefineus.com/posts/2019/2/12/self-care-is-not-selfish monthly 0.5 2019-02-13 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1550019393101-FRUZWF6DHOHT262X10CZ/IMG_1425.JPG Posts - 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Gratitude https://www.numbersdontdefineus.com/posts/2017/11/12/an-open-letter-to-my-body monthly 0.5 2017-11-12 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1510508383399-A1OQ32QAG2DZRLLOU475/FullSizeRender+%286%29.jpg Posts - An Open Letter To My Body https://www.numbersdontdefineus.com/posts/2017/11/5/treatment-taking-the-leap-of-faith monthly 0.5 2017-11-05 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1509915307004-EGYODYBWYCUDI082VR98/DSC_3110+copy.jpg Posts - Treatment: Taking the Leap of Faith https://www.numbersdontdefineus.com/posts/2017/10/28/towards-the-light monthly 0.5 2017-10-29 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1509232664252-E22R8C6NRKZPUYO8Z9P4/3FC6FE0F-C599-4172-A392-8DE72416B5AB.jpg Posts - Towards the Light https://www.numbersdontdefineus.com/posts/2017/10/22/dream-on monthly 0.5 2017-10-22 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1508706401669-31J2WWVCQWM25B1FOOPM/IMG_5283.JPG Posts - 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The Feed https://www.numbersdontdefineus.com/posts/2017/9/12/dont-let-go monthly 0.5 2017-09-21 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1505267763932-J7D07NTMJUU8EZ9Q1F02/IMG_5203.JPG Posts - Don't Let Go https://www.numbersdontdefineus.com/posts/2017/9/4/how-to-become-100-you-again monthly 0.5 2017-09-21 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1504554728855-5K4IIAA0BCFM1GLCMZZ0/FullSizeRender+%281%29.jpg Posts - How To Become 100% You Again https://www.numbersdontdefineus.com/posts/2017/8/28/the-impending-storm monthly 0.5 2017-09-21 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1503935086155-IL1NFICI8ULRAF1YJOOB/DSC_1fdfd55dsds0+ctytopy.jpg Posts - The Impending Storm https://www.numbersdontdefineus.com/posts/2017/8/19/through-the-uncertainty monthly 0.5 2017-09-21 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1503184070651-G0TBFO033XV4P16I9RJ5/DSC_2125.jpg Posts - Through the Uncertainty https://www.numbersdontdefineus.com/posts/2017/8/5/of-warmth-wood-worthiness monthly 0.5 2017-09-21 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1501949830202-A9FUQSFK1SB3GR2BD0JC/image-asset.jpeg Posts - Of Warmth, Wood, & Worthiness https://www.numbersdontdefineus.com/posts/2017/7/28/relationships-in-recovery monthly 0.5 2017-09-21 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1501288274362-J7PUT6PU870OLC86K9DM/image-asset.jpeg Posts - Relationships in Recovery https://www.numbersdontdefineus.com/posts/2017/7/20/hw70yqhwvf52kdib86f1vy30h56aeq monthly 0.5 2017-09-21 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1500595660078-TQ59VARZ9TEA4AJHKMVR/2017_07_20_19_24_54-1.jpg Posts - Letters from the Cambridge "Prison" - December 4th, 2014 Looking at this, you may just see a girl who really loves Christmas, but I see a girl who wasn't willing to take the time to recover, but instead, so focused on getting out of treatment by a specific day. Again, I was so focused on this number day of the month that I was unable to immerse myself in recovery. I also feel sad....the girl who wrote this was so sure she would be discharged before Christmas, but she wasn't. She would soon find herself drowning under tsunamis of tears upon learning this heartbreaking news. But she would also rise. She would vow to never miss another Christmas again, and so far (fingers crossed!!) she hasn't. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1500595677336-0CYP8VH5ERX6XCVDQAYZ/2017_07_20_19_24_54-2.jpg Posts - Letters from the Cambridge "Prison" - December 5th, 2014 This was literally my ED speaking through ink....I was in the darkest depths of my disorder, constantly worrying about my weight and how my meal plan was too caloric for my "slow" (completely made this up) metabolism. This is the epitome of a girl engrossed by irrational body image fears, a girl who is unwilling to recover physically. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1500595713274-6W810S8SK4G7YZ6VOIPZ/2017_07_20_19_26_33-1.jpg Posts - Letters from the Cambridge "Prison" - December 11th, 2014 The first thing I thought while reading this was "God, am I still that melodramatic and stubborn?" It was my stubborn nature that held me in the grip of anorexia for so many years. My mindset was always "my way or the highway." If I didn't get what I want, I would use whatever means necessary to show my frustration, even if it meant taking giant steps backwards in my recovery process. For some reason, I can't help but laugh. Looking back at this, as a fully recovered and happy person, my past thoughts now seem so ridiculous to me. (The lines that really got me were "If I am not out by Christmas, I will literally go insane. I will go on a hunger strike, so I better get out of here" and "I recently got a rash all over my body, and it really itches. I think it's because I'm allergic to this torture.") However, back a couple of years ago, these thoughts were raw and real and kept me entrapped in my disorder. To someone who has not experienced similar struggles: although the thought process of someone who is struggling with an eating disorder seems (and frankly, is) totally absurd, it is the most terrifying and manipulating force ever. So, please show sympathy :) https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1500596356555-YH7PDUTS9U2DWP0NK0WY/2017_07_20_19_26_33-2.jpg Posts - Letters from the Cambridge "Prison" - December 18th, 2014 Reading this journal entry now, I can so clearly see that I was trying to write that I was "better" and "changed" so that I would start to believe it myself....As it came closer to Christmas, I became increasingly more and more anxious to know about my discharge date. I remember the days just before the 25th, I would spend hours yelling at my parents on the phone, trying to convince them that I was ready for the real world. I probably texted my mom 100 paragraphs a day, typing a bunch of gibberish lies in hopes of leaving treatment. Patience truly is a necessity in the recovery process. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1500596369595-ZDSPRICJ3I35OPDGC7EB/2017_07_20_19_28_35-1.jpg Posts - Letters from the Cambridge "Prison" - December 29th, 2014 Clearly, from this date, you can see that I was not discharged by Christmas. I wrote this following a 4-day mental breakdown, too tired to cry any longer. Instead, I became determined to never miss out on living because of my eating disorder. Sometimes, it takes new lows to build new highs. In this case, the low of being stuck in treatment at Christmas lent me a newfound sense of anger towards my illness that would catalyze my recovery. I began to realize that having a skinny frame was not worth losing my happiness and hope. This journal entry is based off of a common exercise, in which a letter is written addressed to one's "ED." For me, this letter was the equivalent of a very angry breakup text. And after I ended this abusive relationship, I felt free and empowered. Goodbye ED, hello recovery. (Please ignore the cringe-worthy drawing, LOL) https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1500596376241-TWEW6DKRBUC5SPZG2ZX0/2017_07_20_19_28_35-2.jpg Posts - Letters from the Cambridge "Prison" - December 31st, 2014 Wow! What a difference a week of being dedicated to recovery can make! I was finally able to acknowledge that treatment was not an unwarranted punishment, but a way out from all the darkness and fear. I was able to realize that I needed help, that I wasn't completely fine. I began to have hope for the future, setting my dreams and goals for the new year. What makes me even happier, looking back, is that I checked off all the things on my 2015 Bucketlist. I did travel half a world away to help clean up the slums of Bangkok. I did (& am currently doing) research in a lab. I did and still am living life to a relative fullness. I am proud that I embraced recovery, for it offered me such amazing opportunities. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1500595808543-1IM8YOJSCHQJ226JKUI0/2017_07_20_19_29_09-1.jpg Posts - Letters from the Cambridge "Prison" - January 5th, 2015 Looking at the progress I made in just one month, I am so proud. I went from only being concerned with maintaining my sickly body to looking towards a future in which anorexia had no place. Thanks to recovery, I became a more grateful, self-aware Simran. https://www.numbersdontdefineus.com/posts/2017/7/13/my-anorexia-story monthly 0.5 2017-09-21 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1499997366440-ZZWQ5D8Z9PY1FDC7GCBN/image-asset.jpeg Posts - My Anorexia Story https://www.numbersdontdefineus.com/posts/2017/7/4/moments-like-these monthly 0.5 2017-09-21 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1499201348178-V254JODBMA1O248G3Y2D/image-asset.jpeg Posts - Moments Like These https://www.numbersdontdefineus.com/posts/2017/6/27/goodbyetothescale monthly 0.5 2017-09-21 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/581fad5e725e25cfd549ae2b/1498591476346-SYUEPKOE1FTQB9RVT1DO/IMG_4372.JPG Posts - #GoodbyeToTheScale Help support @nourishing.nina in spreading the hashtag #GoodbyeToTheScale on social media! https://www.numbersdontdefineus.com/posts/2017/6/19/bikinibod monthly 0.5 2017-09-21 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